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Through helping others, woman replaces grief with joy and anger with peace

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19:58 30/05/2025
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Three years ago, a tidal wave of nearly unbearable grief and anger flooded Victoria Marten Haxel’s world.

Each year since, the flood has receded a bit.

Every October 10, Victoria donates to the Blessing Breast Center patient assistance fund through the Blessing Foundation. The fund supports women in need of financial assistance to receive a mammogram.

Through helping others, woman replaces grief with joy and anger with peace

The date of Victoria’s annual donation is significant. It is the birthdate of her sister, Raina Marten Tappe. Raina passed away April 19, 2019 at the age of 65 from breast cancer. Raina never had a mammogram, but it was not for lack of money.

“She was always just too busy,” Victoria said.

Raina’s cancer was found after she had broken her arm. The breast cancer had spread to her bones, contributing to the break. Victoria says the surgeon told Raina it appeared the tumor had been growing at least 10 years.

“I was angry at my sister for not having mammograms,” Victoria said. “Why wouldn’t you want to take care of that? If she would have had a mammogram, she could have had the lump removed. If you do nothing, it grows.”

Raina fought for five more years before the cancer reached her brain and took her life.

“It was horrible,” Victoria said.

Victoria’s grief and anger peaked at the first mammogram she received after Raina’s death.

“I cried. I felt her death was so unnecessary, so preventable,” she recalled.

Not wishing to remain angry at her sister forever, Victoria decided to donate annually to the Blessing Breast Center patient assistance fund through the Blessing Foundation on Raina’s birthdate.

With each donation, and the love and support of her husband Michael, peace and joy are replacing the grief and anger in Victoria’s life.

“Maybe that was meant to be Raina’s legacy, to help women get the mammograms they need and raise awareness.”

Victoria advocates as well as donates.

“I can’t express enough the importance of a mammogram. Early detection saves lives. I should still have my only sibling, my sister, here with me. But when you wait too long, it’s too late.”

“If you won’t take care of your health for yourself, take care of it for your family,” Victoria concluded.

The American College of Radiology and the Society of Breast Imaging recommend that women undergo a risk assessment at age 30 with their primary care provider to see if screening prior to age 40 is needed. Women at average breast cancer risk should begin screening at age 40. The organizations also recommend women continue screening past age 74, unless their primary care provider recommends otherwise.

Call one of the following numbers to schedule a screening mammogram:

  • Blessing Breast Center, Quincy: 217-223-8400, ext. 4300

  • Illini Community Hospital, Pittsfield: 217-285-2113, ext. 3100

  • Hannibal Clinic: 573-231-3252

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